I think...

I think that things are going to be okay. Things with Jason are awesome. They are like they used to be in the begining. We're happy. We're comunicating. There are things that we both have to work out on our own but we are doing it. I finally got a job! it's at Dillards in the Jrs. department. It's a full time postion and I start out at 9 an hour with a chance of a 10% raise not to far away in the future. I'm going to be busy...once I start school. I think I'm only going to be able to take one class now. Well maybe two but it's going to be hard to fit them in because I have to work in the afternoons and take my classes in the mornings. But I'm pretty sure that I can manage. I'm just excited that I finally got a job. Things are looking up. Even though I haven't been feeling well the past couple days, I feel good today. We have so many plans that we are looking forward to doing. Summer is going to be even more crazy. Only because I have the horse shows and such and I want to go because I have so much fun there. That's all on the weekends though. So hopefully I can get to have some fun. My other problem is when do I get to see Jason....He leaves the apartment at 4:30 in the morning and gets home around 1-2ish. When I start school I'll be leaving after he does but then I won't be getting home till late and he goes to bed when I'll be getting off work or soon to be getting off work. Oh well. I need the money. He is looking for another job also. Oh well. Thats just a little update in my life so far. Things are going pretty good!

er...

Well...I'm starting to become very clingy to Jason. I'm not sure why...But I'm becomming extremely clingy... I have to be with him all the time and cuddly and stuff... I'm really starting to fall hard for him which I never expected to do...Yeah we live together but I never thought that I would fall for him like this... I am and I'm falling fast. I'm affraid though that I may be falling to fast but I'm not sure yet how to slow down. Yesterday was awesome between us. It was different almost...better more powerful.. I'm not sure what happened. Maybe it's just me and ya'll know I get alittle crazy somtimes. I'm trying to play this one by the book...but the problem is I can't find that dang book...I'm really feelin for him...maybe some love? I never thought that I would ever say that...We'll see what happens this summer and if I still feel like this...

It's killing me

I can hear the alarm going off
I hear you get up and turn it off
It's the start of your day
I hear you moving around
Not even trying to be quiet
I lay there
I think how long it's take me to get back to sleep
I hear you pack your lunch in your cooler
You fix your breakfast
Your dressed and ready to go
You have your coffee
You have your smokes
You grab your phone
You walk out the door

Your missing something though
You just don't know it
Maybe you've forgotten
Maybe you just don't care

Did you know that your girlfriend is awake?
She's wondering if maybe today will be the day you don't forget.
Did you know she cries when you leave?

What I miss the most is your kiss goodbye.

The true colors?

Posted Date: : Jan 2, 2007 10:15 AM

Well....we're almost done moving. Just a few more things. I need for it to be over. Moving depresses me. Right now, alot of things are depressing me but the moving is what got it started. Hopefully once the moving is done and over with for good I'll return to myself. This happened when I moved a little while ago. Just as I was getting back to normal we pick up and move. Oh well. I like where I am right now. I like being around people instead of out in the middle of no where. And the fact that I am closer to Val Val is awesome.

There's been a lot of tension between Jason and I. He's this way with his family and me. He's very upfront with who he is. But there are things that he says that upsets me. I slept on the couch last night. I just didn't feel like getting up and going to bed. I just didn't care. Sometimes I wonder what the hell I'm doing. I'll never know. Oh well.

I haven't worked in almost a week. They don't need me. Hopefully I can start working at the clinic soon. I can't wait. It's going to be fun I think. I really want to be in the enviroment that I am going to be working in. I can't wait. Okay. I think that this is enough for now. I feel like I should be at home unloading my car so that I can go to the apartment and get the few items that are left. But I don't feel like it.